there back my sucidal visions are back, they chase after me like its some cruel game

 i go to the track all i do is run screaming  " go away" mom finds

me takes me in her arms rocking me like an innocent child. the leave for now they taunt

me saying theyll be back. i cant get rid of them no matter how hard i try. what did i do

to desevre this. i punch and kick my way out my mothers arms. i dont want to hurt her

but i dont feel as if i can look at her. i feel tears streaming down my face i know im going weak

im not as strong as i use to be. i run to my room under my bed is a knife i slice myself to make the

pain go away at least for now. i cry myself to sleep i feel my moms presence in the room.

i wish i didnt hurt her i wish this didnt hurt me what did i do. i dont deserve this life anymore why

cant i just end it now while i have a chance too. cause im to scared ill lose the game if i do but why me