Posted: 1/14/2010 - 4 comment(s) [ Comment ] - 79 trackback(s) [ Trackback ]
Category: my feelings

Tomorrow is a big day for my sister and I. She will be arriving in the morning to my home. She has decided to proceed in getting some help for herself. So I printed out for BC, a criminal victims form for her to fill out. As I go through these forms there are 12 pages to go through. This is going to be rough on her and very challenging. I pray I have enough strength to help her through this. There is a section on there about the times and days experience etc... and I know this is going to be a trigger for her and hoping not for me. The more she writes though the better because this will give her eligibility for free counselling etc...  The first step for my sister was opening up and asking for help. This is going to be the second step for my sister in her healing. I'm so proud of her, I will be right beside her through everything. I know though, that I have to keep strong for myself and not forget where I'm at in my healing and continue with mine as well. I just wanted to share this with you, I have several posts about my sister on how I resent her and pity her and how she was abusive to her family and my mother and I but, I do love her no matter what and I do forgive her because none of it was her fault. I blame everything on our father the ABUSER. I hope one day to tell my sister about this site, but I'm not ready yet for her to read my posts. Also I feel this is my place to be right now and I don't want to share. I have not told anybody about this site because this is were I let it all out. If I share to my family and friends here, I will hold a lot in and what would be my purpose to be on here then.  I hope that doesn't sound selfish.

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