I’m sorry for the way I act

I never meant to hurt you
I don’t know why I do it
But the pain feels great and I can’t stop

You see the pain is addictive to me
It’s a distraction from my mental state
Some may say I’m crazy
I wish that made me stop

I started long ago
I picked up my very first blade
Now I can’t put it down
My mind is such a mess

I don’t expect you to understand
But sometimes I wish you’d try
I know its destroying my life
The scars are proof of that

I know I need help
This place is so dark
Tell me how can something so bad?
Feel so fucking great

I am ashamed
I don’t know why I picked it up
Another doctor to stitch me up
Another scar to cover up

I’m sorry sister
I’m sorry friend
But this was never about you
It was just my sweet escape